{"id":1170,"date":"2010-02-27T15:25:50","date_gmt":"2010-02-27T15:25:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.feelnubia.com\/?p=1170"},"modified":"2025-02-14T18:06:37","modified_gmt":"2025-02-14T18:06:37","slug":"warrior-princess-the-beginning-beckons","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/feelnubiatest.com\/index.php\/2010\/blog-misc-and-opinions\/warrior-princess-the-beginning-beckons\/","title":{"rendered":"Warrior Princess: The beginning beckons…"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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The Warrior Princess: Yvonne<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Do you know what it\u2019s like to be given news that could be deemed a death sentence?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

This blog is the story of my journey dealing with a Cancer diagnosis.  My theory is that my faith in God and tenacity as an African woman, have contributed to my triumph in the face of adversity.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

A relatively healthy young woman with no need for medical care for as long as I could remember, I had started to notice that I was losing weight and felt a lump on my left side\u2013 but put it down to the fact that I hardly ate anything and had started exercising to tone my stomach muscles and had probably pulled a muscle.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n


I was totally numb when finally given the diagnosis and rushed home to pay off all my bills \u2013 never question the reasoning of a confused mind. I remember calling my Cousin-in-law. When I told him, he suggested I phoned the Andrew Womack prayer line. The lady at the other end was compassionate enough, but I knew I needed stronger prayers \u2013 I put that down to the African woman in me – we take what belongs to us \u2018by fire and by force\u2019. I can honestly tell you I slept VERY well that night.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n


It is this belief in a power larger than me and other than myself which allows me to venture into the unknown and even the unknowable<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

– <\/em>Maya Angelou<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I woke up and had a conversation with God \u2013 telling him I could not do this alone \u2013 I knew that only prayer could make a difference. As I was always on Facebook \u2013 the Holy Spirit suggested that I contact my friends on Facebook to support me in prayer. I initially sent an email to those I believed were Christians but this resulted in me receiving numerous messages of concern. I again was inspired to create a \u201cgroup\u201d which I named Yvonne\u2019s Pillars of Support and invited my friends and theirs to join in support.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


Ignoring the negative stereotypes of black women and holding on to the positive, black women are perceived as pillars of strength \u2013 nurturing, resilient and STRONG (with connotations of being Independent), a perception that I have always been proud to accept. I would not however have imagined that I would be able to withstand a personal burden of this magnitude, yet emerge totally prepared to face the demands of life – until this happened..
Here\u2019s the first message I sent:<\/em><\/strong>

February 26 at 2:32pm
Hi everyone – sorry to those this is going to come as a shock to but I\u2019ve been diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer.

Naturally I reject the works of the devil in my life but must respond to the war he has declared.

I\u2019m so blessed having found that like the cripple in Mark: 2 I have friends ready to hoist me through a roof – if necessary, to obtain my divine healing. For this I am truly grateful.

God has shown me with signs and wonders that he is ahead of me in this one, with me and behind me. Words cannot express my reverence for the God we serve.

Though the battle is won on my side, I must turn up to fight. My request is that if you are able to, you stand with me in agreeing that the evil report the devil has prepared for me on Monday 1st of March 2010 @09:15 AM is negated miraculously by the blood and in the mighty name of Jesus.

I\u2019m meeting with a group of clinicians to discuss my options and will try to ensure I don\u2019t get \u201csectioned\u201d via the \u201cmental health act\u201d as I rebuke their every negative report as they speak it.

I have purposed in my heart no matter what is proposed that the only report for me on this is the promise of the Lord for an abundant, prosperous life, which I will live to his glory.

Peeps, the only party I intend to have on this is a Victory Dance – no pity party. When Jesus said \u2018It is finished\u2019, it was. This is but a mild affliction and this too shall pass.

Counting on your support\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

————————————————————————————————————<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Our human response to disease of any kind at one extreme is denial, secrecy or a sense of shame which may lead to despair at the thought of dying. It\u2019s as if one has failed by ALLOWING this to happen. Irrationally, I believe in the quote below\u2026along with the concept of being a Strong Black Woman<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed.  If I fail, no one will say, “She doesn’t have what it takes.”  They will say, “Women don’t have what it takes.”<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

– Clare Boothe Luce

And so I set about a strategy to deal with my situation and define the rules of engagement which required wisdom and holy intervention.
I was determined that I was not going to wallow in self pity.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————-
March 1 2010 at 6:40pm
SAGA UPDATE

Went to appointment as planned \u2026.nurse could not find the doctor for at least 40 minutes \u2026

When they found a doctor I thought surely Satan you could have done better than THIS – the androgynous beast approached with a grimace on her face…..

\u2026.she screamed my name. \u201cYes, Good Morning\u201d I responded with a smile on my face, bum barely on the chair. She says \u201cIt\u2019s bad news\u201d \u2026I smile\u2026I say \u201cWhat?\u201d \u201cThe tumour is malignant\u201d\u2026She does not know \u201cTests have to be done, but everything is pointing to bad news\u201d I say \u2018Really? When will the test be done?\u201d They\u2019ve referred me to the specialists\u2026.. \u201cOn Wednesday 3rd of March between 2 and 4\u201d.

I asked if I had misunderstood the intention of the meeting and they said I had not but they had decided to refer me on\u2026.I asked for copies of the results and left \u2026..

Bottom line was this morning was a waste of time in the natural\u2026but in the spiritual realm not so \u2026your prayers have started to change things \u2026

I\u2019m praying at 00:00 for (at least 15 minutes) the next 3 days for the Holy Spirit to remove all that is not of God from my system such that any tests that are performed are subsequently found to be negative\u2026..if you can join me \u2013 please do \u2026\u2026

I WILL TESTIFY AS TO THE GOODNESS AND MERCY OF GOD IN MY LIFE.

I\u2019m really grateful for all your support.
Yvonne<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

—————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 2, 2010 at 9:09pm
My darlin\u2019 friends it\u2019s not in the noise making that we will win this battle but in the sincerity of heart with which we rise up to fight and the clarity of our authority to command things to change …

I hear Pops is proud of us making a stance like this …..

I’m just so grateful I can call on you in my time of need…..My Father in heaven will surely reward you ….<\/em>
—————————————————————————————————————-
March 3 2010 at 11:11am
Hi everyone …thank you sooooo much………going to the Hospital @15:00….just to hear what they have to say ….will let you all know later …..

Thanks for all who are praying at 0:00 GMT we have one more night to go….

My testimony will be that they could not find anything when they run the tests.

I am getting tired easily as I cannot eat and the weight of my swollen stomach (full of water) is making me uncomfortable – have to lie down …otherwise I’m well…

Speak to you all later …..<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–
<\/em>March 3, 2010 at 9:47pm
My heart is overjoyed at the faithfulness of my God …I cannot stop singing in my spirit….

Its been suggested that we break bread as a family …please see Pillars\u2019 Wall for instructions …

I love you all so dearly ….words fail me …but my God WILL reward you …watch out !!!

<\/em>
March 4, 2010 at 7:33pmThanks everyone. Been a long day….the battle is not over yet …we must continue to pray …will keep you posted …hospital yet to confirm when I need to go in…

Please pray for me as I\u2019m weary….Will be at home most of the day tomorrow catching up on healing scriptures and singing my Yoruba praise and worship songs…..

Saints, pls pray for 3 ladies who I\u2019ve met recently along this journey regarding Breast Cancer, a growth in the eye and Lupus…..WE will all celebrate together…..

I’m honoured to have you all as Pillars of support and do not take this lightly….<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve always known that patience is not a virtue I possess\u2026but boy did I learn to be patient during this trial\u2026in cases like this there is just nothing you can do but WAIT!!!!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Impatience translates itself into a desire to have something immediately done about it all, and, as is generally the case with impatience, resolves itself in the easiest way that lies ready to hand.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

– Edward Sapir<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I found solace in updating my friends and family \u2026.Over the next few days these were my postings\u2026
<\/em><\/strong>——————————————————————————————————————–
March 5 at 2:31pm
Be still my beating heart only the counsel of the Lord will stand concerning you …just got a call fast forwarding my diagnostics via private health for Monday…..not sure if to accept or wait on NHS
<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–
March 7 at 3:14pm
Hi dear friends…

Thanks for all your support I\u2019m indebted to you all….especially to all of you who I\u2019ve never met and have joined to support me. I lift you up before God for a special treat and know he is faithful to meet your every need.

A few of you know I’ve been unable to eat, but praise God I had a bit of food this weekend.

My stomach is still bloated and now giving me back ache – but I believe this is only for a short while… God\u2019s healing will manifest soon….My right leg for instance is back to normal.

I’m not going to work next week (yes, that\u2019s right) a darling friend has blessed me financially so my pay- as- you- go excuse does not hold water ( I contract on a daily rate and only get paid if I work). For those of you who know me well, you know I\u2019m proud in a good way…. I\u2019m allowing this experience to humble me so God can touch me and work with, through and on me…. I\u2019ve had estranged friends show up to support and ex-boyfriends pledge allegiance… I have definitely learnt the true meaning of friendship……

I go into Hospital on Tuesday by his grace and will make sure you are all kept informed….

Each of you with your messages, calls, texts, songs and scriptures have turned what was meant for my downfall into a learning experience…..and opportunity to test my belief in God and prove him….

I assure you He gives you PEACE to deal with situations like this which are not readily comprehensible humanly. I’ve been accused of being in denial by some well meaning people …but because I have been insistent that all I need is prayers even my Atheist Boss has promised to pray – I have promised to deal with her after this…

Let\u2019s not underestimate the power of Praise…therein lies our Victory and will indeed be the theme of our Dance….

Shalom, my Pillars of Support…. God is my strength and you my support …I’m truly victorious!!!!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 8 at 11:33am
Morning All

I\u2019m BORED!!!!!…just found out Hospital Appointment is Thursday for 1 night only now ….not sure why ….but guess God IS in control…my message over the weekend was BE STILL AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD ….

Thanks for all your prayers …I woke up Hungry this morning…a VERY good sign for me ….don\u2019t really eat normally….

Just wanted to say – thanks for being at the other end of this message….it\u2019s a great comfort to know I have a reliable God and dependable friends….

Shalom!!!!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I read this today and it resonates with my recent experience so perfectly. You can find the original at http:\/\/www.holyangels.com<\/a>

To a Black Woman who finds God, \u201cGod is understood as a partner in life rather than a distant observer.\u201d

Understanding the divinity within, Black women set themselves free.  That freedom comes from aligning oneself with the Holy Spirit. 

It is the Black Woman\u2019s faith in God that helps her deal with the injustices, imbalance, losses and sickness \/ disease in life. 

God within the Black Woman forces her to heal.  Her active participation in her healing is fuelled by the fact that she knows the well-being of her family rests on her revival.  This revival of the soul allows the Black Woman \u201c…to be made whole\u2014to be the continuation of the Black past and builders of the Black future.\u201d

This internal spirituality, ensuring that the Spirit is kept within, pushes the Black Woman forward.  It is this sense of a personal God, one who speaks clearly, that keeps the Black Woman pressing on.

To fully grasp the Black Woman\u2019s sense of the Divine, one must first understand her roots.  Rooted in a culture (African Diaspora) that recognizes the connection of all creation, the Black Woman understands that there is something greater than herself.  She also realizes that her ability to rise comes not from her, but the Divine in her who promises her long life and prosperity.


This was my message to the Pillars on the 9th of March 2010<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 9 at 9:42am
A few of you have commented on my Faith\u2026and how you feel challenged\u2026as they are not sure they would have done what I have \u2026call on people to support them like this \u2026.

I would like to share something with you all\u2026.

Outwardly I appear altogether \u2013 know what I want when I want it and if I want it.

Some of my friends describe me as bold, assertive, opinionated, blunt, principled , stubborn , and I know some of you refer to me as \u201cThatcher \u201c as I do not suffer fools gladly\u2026.

The reality \u2013 on one hand I\u2019m venerable, easily hurt \u2013 quite deeply and extremely wary of people, have sometimes unrealistic high expectations of myself and on the other playful, mischievous, naughty and adventurous.

Over the years I have come to know God as my Father \u2013 I approach him for counsel and guidance\u2026.Pops when I\u2019m being playful and mischievous\u2026Daddy\u2026when I need a shoulder to cry on or want something \u2026

My friends who have heard me pray are amazed and amused at the unorthodox way I relate to God but therein lies the key \u2013 I have a relationship with him that suits my temperament, character and perspective on life\u2026.

I acknowledge his majesty, his awesomeness and reverence as the I AM\u2026I believe his every word and promise to me \u2026I know he cannot and will not leave me \u2026.and on that basis I feel safe in his arms and can do all things I purpose to do \u2026.which is why I make seemingly crazy requests and get responses\u2026ask for outlandish outcomes and they come to fruition and know without a shadow of doubt that I am the apple of his eye\u2026..

So when something threatens my life \u2013 the life given to me by God \u2026claimed for by the blood of Jesus and managed by the Holy Spirit\u2013 knowing who I am in him \u2013 the only sensible thing is to run to him\u2026.but then he has equipped me to walk in the authority of my relationship with him and left instructions on how to be victorious\u2026given me brothers and sisters who can support me\u2026angels I can command to do as I decree\u2026and the confidence to understand that it\u2019s okay to be \u2026bold, assertive, opinionated, blunt, principled, stubborn , and not suffer fools gladly\u2026.especially at this time\u2026.

As you can see it\u2019s not by my might or power but by the Spirit of the Lord of Hosts (Zechariah 4: 6) that I can boldly claim my inheritance through Christ \u2026..

The challenge my friends is to know God in a way that makes sense to you so YOU can confidently stand in the time of trouble….

SELAH !!!!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After all the too-ing and fro-ing \u2026finally went into hospital to have a biopsy of the mass in my stomach\u2026there was not much to say really so my messages were as follows\u2026.
<\/strong><\/em>
March 10 at 1:29pm
Hi Folks …conceded to going Private – Long Story will let you know….so going in tomorrow…

Good thing is I have a room to myself so we can pray and declare our Victory before during and after …..

The consultant is Mr Mark George …I\u2019m praying and believing that he will declare the WONDER of our God as he will be astounded by the MIRACLE that is my expectation….

I know you have all been praying …now we need to claim our Victory with Praise and Worship unto the most High….

I go in at 09:00 and will stay for the night ….

I love you all so dearly – thank you from the bottom of my heart !!!!

<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 13 at 4:35pm
Sorry could not keep in touch…went in as planned on Thursday Morning..

My 3 legged Consultant finally appears at about 10:00 \u2013 having broken his leg and on crutches \u2026I asked if this was not a \u2018Physician,-Heal-thyself-case\u2019\u2026and who was going to shimmy over to whom so we could talk\u2026..

He explained I\u2019 have a drain put in to remove the excess liquid in my stomach and a biopsy of the mass in my pelvis\u2026.and he\u2019d see me on his scooter later\u2026

The Radiographer came at about 15:00 which gave my friends and family ample time to possess the room, staff and healing of other patients on the ward\u2026we made such a holy racket\u2026.

The drain is the nastiest procedure I have ever had to live through – never again in Jesus Name\u2026I had 6 liters of bloody fluid (nope I\u2019m not swearing) removed and my tummy is still not yet empty \u2026apparently taking anymore out might make my body go into shock\u2026

The biopsy site is still soooo painful ..I was told that\u2019s because the muscles have been bruised\u2026.

They also discovered my HB level was 6.  The norm is 12\u2026.this is where I begun to understand that my confession \u201cGod is my strength\u201c has sustained me over the weeks \u2026I have never felt faint or unable to do anything when in the natural I should have keeled over\u2026.

I had to have a blood transfusion\u2026I jokingly asked the nurse where the blood (as they were Vampires in the Hospital) was from and she asked me to sanctify it \u2026. We all laid hands on the blood and the transfusion began\u2026same for bag 2 \u2026by bag 3 (around midnight) another nurse asked if I wanted to pray on the blood which I did (word or the noise had gotten around) \u2026I reacted to the blood and had to take Piriton so decided to stay another night to make sure I was okay\u2026.

This gave me the opportunity to read Job and put myself in his position\u2026more importantly to hear God\u2019s take on the situation\u2026I\u2019m thanking God for his mercy \u2026\u2026 as the nurses pulled out the drain (without anaesthetic)\u2026my muscles reacted by clamping on the tube which made it an excruciating experience \u2026I asked myself what I had done to deserve this\u2026reading Job helped me deal with the fact that God will reward me for all I have gone through\u2026and that is all that matters right now \u2026

Sorry could not update you early was bed bound for most of the time \u2026back home now \u2026waiting for the results next week \u2026WE KNOW WHOSE REPORT WE BELIEVE\u2026.

Love you all Lots …..

At this point was still unsure about the next steps but knew the mass needed to be extracted \u2026I can honestly say not much was going through my mind regarding the whole scenario \u2026.somehow it all felt surreal.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Wikipedia definition of Emotion\u2026.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Emotion is the complex psycho physiological experience of an individual’s state of mind as interacting with biochemical (internal) and environmental (external) influences.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The basic emotions I\u2019d felt up until this time were Trust, Anticipation and Hope in God as my Healer\u2026never anything negative yet I cried.  It\u2019s postulated that crying is both an arousing distress signal and a means to restore psychological and physiological balance\u2026with hindsight I was stressed and in denial of my physical needs.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n


But I guess I\u2019m wired to deal with issues and take control\u2026but by this stage I was playing the waiting game \u2026 and feeling out of control\u2026 remember for me this is not on \u2026.I\u2019m a Strong Black Woman\u2026\u2026<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n


Alas true Strength is about dealing with your emotions, not bottling them up\u2026\u2026
The perception of strength as Black Women keeps us centred, and focused. It allows us to be the pillar of strength for those around us\u2026.but it also keeps us sick, with high blood pressure from stress, taking on more than we can manage, not eating right, and anxiety.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n


At some point there has to be a balance. There has to be a release for the Black woman. We need to accept that bottling up emotions, fears, anxieties, etc is not healthy.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Accepting that you are ill does not take away your strength; it only means that you are aware that you may need medical attention. Seeking help does not make you any less a believer or not trusting of God but a smart woman seeking to understand what is happening to be able to make an informed choice.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not promoting total reliance on emotions. I am promoting Black women getting the help they need, if there is a need for it and not seeing it as a sign of weakness \u2013 whatever the scenario.

<\/strong><\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 16 at 12:32pm
..had a terrible night …did not sleep at all…I actually cried unto God for Mercy …but felt weird doing so as I do not know him as One who desires that we suffer and grovel for His attention….

Thank you all for your prayers. As the pain occupies me I can only listen to praise and worship…woke up singing along with the CD yesterday evening….

Sorry if I cannot take calls …too weak to talk – a first indeed for me ….but I do try to take the international ones….

My girlfriends have formed a nanny service with someone ever present to ensure I\u2019m comfortable – I\u2019m so grateful …..

Apparently the natural healing process for internal wounds takes quite a while but I should be okay by the end of the week….when our report as decreed will be NEGATIVE …..

I cannot tell you the countless text messages, phone calls and words of encouragement that have flooded my life these last few days…

My friends\u2019 children have marveled me the most – calling to see if I\u2019m okay ….the sweetest of all was when my 3-year old niece called her 5 year old brother to the kitchen to ask \u2013 \u2018what\u2019s wrong with auntie Lide?<\/strong>\u2019 (they call me Auntie Laide)…and he said \u2018She’s not feeling well….<\/strong>\u2019

I asked them both to lay hands on me and pray and high five me …my brother has nicked-named them Goodness<\/strong> and Mercy<\/strong> …so now I have both Goodness and Mercy at my right hand to use as I require….

I am so looking forward to the Victory Dance – got my dress sorted peeps ….you should too……

<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 18 at 3:58am
I had a funny day yesterday \u2013 in and out of pain\u2026throwing up and being uncomfortable\u2026.Sensing that our Victory is nigh \u2026.my adversary has run out of tricks to play \u2026..

I\u2019m calling up for my results today 18\/03\/10 and believe that our decree has been honoured and as such ask that we only PRAISE and WORSHIP from now on \u2026

Please use Psalms 94 as the Victory Foundation especially v: 16 \u2013 23\u2026and then Psalms 95 – 105 \u2026..

Will let you know as soon as I do \u2026..again, thanks a million for your support\u2026..

<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

March 19 at 9:37am
First apologies for going quiet yesterday …

A big apology to all who called and sent text messages …just could not physically deal with them ….finding it difficult to keep food down yet have pain killers to take …..so I\u2019m in and out of sleep most of the day ….and very cranky :0) – at least that\u2019s normal ….

Thank you all for your concern …the conflicting advice is amusing …I get: \u2018put a cold compress on your tummy\u2019 … \u2018No, a hot one\u2019… \u2018Make sure you walk around\u2019 … \u2018Ensure you sit in one place\u2019 …. \u2018Sleep, oh\u2019 … \u2018Don\u2019t sleep\u2019 …..

I spent the greater part of the morning chasing the 2 Private Consultants in charge of my case for the results …each claiming the other had them…their PAs saying they were in clinic….

Intermittently I’d speed redial them to see if they’d pick up …finally the Gynae Oncologist picked up at 16:26 …we spoke for 41 seconds most of which I spent apologizing for the numerous messages on his phone …to which he responded I’ll call you back in 30 mins – just looking through your results …….

Have not heard from him since …..

I can only trust that God has definitely dealt with them and they are confused….

In the meantime, let the rejoicing and worship continue ….<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

—————————————————————————————————————-After a longer than expected stay in Hospital, I came back home barely able to walk. My mum had arrived a few days before and I felt so sorry for her\u2026 as a mother to witness her child going through all this\u2026 but at least we\u2019d come through it \u2026..
I remember the drive from the Hospital, my Church had organized for me to be dropped off at home\u2026 I looked at the people walking on the streets minding their own business, oblivious to me and my emotional reunion with the outside world\u2026 stepping into my house\u2026 I was overwhelmed to be back\u2026
A lot had happened while I was away so to speak\u2026 in the hospital l had not had access to a TV or Radio and so I was attempting to catch up with reality\u2026 I had just made it home for the World Cup opening ceremony\u2026\u2026..<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

June 11 at 3:01pm<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

My darling prayer family\u2026 may I take this opportunity to thank you for my life\u2026 but for you all\u2026 the plans of the enemy would have come to fruition. I came home yesterday after 9 weeks in hospital\u2026 just weighing 48kg\u2026 a shadow of myself but filled with gratitude that I have a second lease of life\u2026

Seriously, thanks especially to all the families with young children who prayed for me\u2026 my spiritual children are very dear to me\u2026 many times I lay in bed and prayed for them especially that no harm will ever befall them and that our God will surely reward their labour of love\u2026 The gratitude I feel cannot be expressed verbally\u2026 to my God who was the core pillar of my life\u2026 I\u2019m indebted with the very life you have given me\u2026 to all who have prayed my God will surely reward you\u2026

May this phase of my life be more productive for the kingdom than the last in the mighty name of Jesus. In the coming days, I\u2019ll fill you in but all I can say is we need to get our praise on… Because we have indeed been victorious\u2026 even though our prayers turned the tide and the report shifted from cancerous to benign the consultants are still insistent I have chemo\u2026 not my portion\u2026

I\u2019m concentrating on getting sinews and fat around me bones over the next few days\u2026 so please, please no guests\u2026 getting as much rest and food down me as physically possible\u2026 although I will be looking out for that wretched cat \u2026

Love you all very much

Yvonne<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–
June 11 at 6:13pm<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Watched the opening ceremony of the games and was touched by the song…..

I can see the colors of the rainbow,
and I can feel the sun on my face,
I see the light at the end of the tunnel,
and I can feel heaven in its place,
and that\u2019s the sign of a victory (x2)

I can feel the spirit of my pillars of support
and I can feel my wings ridin\u2019 the winds, yeah
I see the finish line just up ahead
and I can feel it risin\u2019 deep within
and that\u2019s the sign of a victory (x2)

If we believe, we can achieve anything including the impossible this I know so let\u2019s lift up our heads and raise our Praises unto God and scream like you know we have won !! that\u2019s the sign of a victory (x4)


When you keep on fightin\u2019, after you lost your strength that\u2019s the sign of a victory
when darkness is all around you, you still find your way that\u2019s the sign of a victory
come on and sing, lift up your voice and sing, stand up, oh yeah, stand up
sign of a victory ooooohh ohh ohhhh<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Rest is a good thing, but boredom is its brother <\/em>– Voltaire

The Structure of Boredom<\/a> as described by Thomas C Oden (1969) in his paper Structure of Awareness is depicted in a diagram at the link indicated.

Ignoring the causal loops numbered (6) and (7)\u2026.\u201d..The self (1) relates to the now or present actuality in the mode of immediate experiencing (2). When that present (3) is symbolized as being devoid of values regarded as necessary for one’s existence, one experiences boredom (5). Boredom is the awareness that the essential values through which one fulfills himself are not able to be actualized under these present circumstances\u2026.<\/em>\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


As Black Women it\u2019s a stereotypical clich\u00e9 that we somehow manage to creatively cope with stressful situations\u2026.some may even say that we are the epitome of stress\u2026a debate for another time – but accommodating Stress has always been my way of dealing with Boredom\u2026but here I was bored and anxious and dare I say \u2026with hindsight\u2026experiencing a sense of guilt ???<\/strong>

June 17 at 2:57pm
Finally getting to sleep at night …though I\u2019m bored during the day ….Mum and I fast becoming football fanatics…

My peeps \u2026just had to moan \u2026all you fashionistas know the sales are on right now \u2026.for me \u2026don\u2019t have a clue what\u2019s going on \u2026not physically fit to survey the terrain and do what I do best \u2013 discount shop\u2026naw online shopping does not cut it \u2026and anyway the trick is knowing what\u2019s out there before the sale \u2026\u2026

Yet again I am reminded of those things I took for granted prior to this trial \u2026I have clothes shoes and bags that if sold will feed a small village for over a year \u2026and those are the ones I\u2019m yet to wear \u2026..yet my heart skips a beat at the thought of the goodies I\u2019m missing out on \u2026..

I pray I am able to use this experience to focus on what really matters in life from now on \u2026my physical body is sooo drained \u2026\u2026from lack of exercise, food and nourishment and this has made me wonder about my spiritual body \u2013 after all we\u2019re not to live by bread alone \u2026.but how much of the word do I truly feed my body with \u2026thank God that he is merciful and does not give us what we truly deserve\u2026and more importantly that its not about our works ….but not withstanding I’m looking for reading material to further strengthen my perspective of God ……

I\u2019m stuffing myself as much as I can \u2026for those of you who know me well\u2026that means my bird size meal portions are increasing \u2026would appreciate suggestions re high calorie foods I can binge on \u2026p.s: no milk based stuff thanks\u2026

Loving you all more and more each day …as, if not for your support – where would I be …..<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

So I try to get creative  to deal positively with how I\u2019 m feeling \u2026the sense of having been  given a second chance is overwhelming and probably best expressed with the poem below:<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Second Chance
I’ve been given another chance, a second life to live.
A rebirth has occurred, transgressions I forgive.
I now notice songs from birds, how sweet to the ear.
The flash of hummingbird’s wings, as they dance and disappear.

~No more sorrow, no more grief.
~No hesitation, life’s too brief. ~

Or how about your feelings, when you hear your favourite song?
Or a lover’s first kiss, you’ll know if it is wrong.
I now see the all the colours, I never saw before.
My heart has been softened, as God opened up the door.

~No more sorrow, no more grief.~
~No hesitation, life’s too brief.~

I’m not the same as before, no more hatred or bad will.
I love to watch the world now, sitting on my window sill.
God has made me whole now, and He’s given peace.
That is what I pray for you, and your troubles to all cease.

~No more sorrow, no more grief.~
~No hesitation, life’s too brief.~
Author notes
Sgt B (Ron Britton) – Written April 16th 2007
<\/strong>

<\/em>June 23 at 11:13am
Hi all \u2026I\u2019m writing today with a heavy heart filled with both gratitude and sadness\u2026.2 people (close to some of those praying for and with me) fighting their own battles with illness died (don\u2019t like that word \u2013 passed on to a better place)\u2026.yet I also know of 2 others (and myself) who have been victorious over the same time span\u2026
Indeed your ways are not necessarily clear to us oh lord but you know best and are God\u2026a good one in that..
Please pray peace into the lives of all affected\u2026I look around me and a filled with a sense of I could easily not have made it\u2026
Saw Consultant yesterday he said final biopsy was malignant hence the need for chemo \u2013 somehow I don\u2019t believe him more in my spirit than anything else\u2026.have asked him to confirm pathology to my GP and conceded to meet with the Oncologist for him to advice me on chemo.
Please stand with me as I seek Gods will regarding this next stage \u2013 honestly I aint feeling it as I know my God has healed me\u2026but as in all this Lord I submit to your counsel as I KNOW you alone hold me up and assure my good health\u2026.

On a cheerier note\u2026I\u2019m able to wear skinny jeans and my Ed hardy tops and trainers- and thank God for the sun \u2013 sunglasses and look like a size 0 model (so my neighbour said) \u2013 just need to get my nails , eyebrows and exchange my long wig for a weave – on then I\u2019m good to go \u2026\u2026
Basking in the knowledge that I have you all supporting me and God supporting us all\u2026Shalom<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

P.s: Ladies ONLY \u2013 who knows where I can get padded pants and bras \u2013 in desperate need of support in those areas -only serious replies pls – in box me<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

So I\u2019m out of Hospital \u2026not knowing what to expect \u2026not even thinking about what next \u2026just basking in the fact that I was out of Hospital\u2026..and now having to deal with the notion of Chemotherapy !!!!…<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


Looking back now I always had my life mapped out \u2026I\u2019d plan and organize stuff well in advance \u2026with not a care that my tomorrow would not actually come \u2026I arrogantly assumed it would\u2026..As usual I\u2019d arranged to go to New York for a few days with a friend \u2013 ticket and accommodation all sorted in August 2009.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So here I am July 2010 looking so frail and ill\u2026a normal person would  just accept their lot and concentrate on getting better \u2026Me \u2026Oh No \u2026.I get on the internet and arrange wheel chair support for the flight \u2013 God Bless Virgin \u2026.and a Scooter to act as my feet in Manhattan \u2013 aint no stopping me at all\u2026.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

My friend Ruth (who is about the only person I can travel with, without the usual companion drama) went with me \u2026and I can tell you we had the time of our lives\u2026I ran over her toes a few times before I got the hang of the Scooter and we had loads of laughs when people gasped in amazement when I\u2019d venture out of the chair to reach for something on the top shelf in a store\u2026.and getting stuck on the zebra crossing as the lights changed was classic\u2026I just sat there watching the cars zoom towards me \u2026unable to get up and run \u2026until a gallant passerby dragged both scooter and I to safety\u2026\u2026.what touched me the most was when we got on the subway \u2013 wrongly identifying the station we were going to as having disabled access we got off the train before we realized it didn\u2019t \u2026loads of people ignored our dilemma except a strapping Latino man who carried the Scooter up the stairs for us\u2026.honestly there are a FEW good people out there\u2026there really are\u2026..<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Poignantly I learned on that trip never to take things for granted\u2026.it so easy not to realize how hard everyday things are for those with a disability\u2026..<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

After 4 nights out there I came back weak and tired but able to pull a face at the devil \u2026you CANNOT stop me\u2026..no matter what you try\u2026I kept my friends updated by daily status updates\u2026.and came back to the reality of the doctors and nurses and even my carers going on about the need for Chemotherapy\u2026and everyday living<\/strong>July 26 at 12:03pm
Sorry for the long silence….

What we know from the word of God \u2026.Knowing who God is …is what saves our lives but then Understanding who you are in God is crucial…to claim his promises….I am so grateful that I did not die …and thankful that I had you all at my time of need..

What\u2019s really touched me is the continued love of my friends and family \u2013 especially the guys\u2026always believed its difficult for men to express themselves\u2026but my male friends have proven me wrong\u2026they have sent me words and scriptures of encouragement and chosen to speak to me about my situation and to get up dates (on the phone and funny enough none of those who have called are in England)\u2026.after my conversations with one yesterday \u2026I smiled and said this is why God made man and woman so different\u2026our perspectives bring balance to a situation\u2026

He was concerned about the big issues that are a consequence of my not being able to work and still requiring treatment\u2026while it\u2019s not like I\u2019m not concerned \u2013 have handed it over to God \u2026I was telling him about the blessings of those who were sending me groceries or turning up with food etc \u2026and about pining for another pair of shoes (I know I\u2019m an ADDICT)\u2026.
Please continue to pray with me re the next step as I\u2019m being advised \u2013 STRONGLY- now to have chemo\u2026so it does not come back\u2026…I KNOW I\u2019m healed \u2026in fact I have been made WHOLE\u2026..and so don\u2019t want to \u2013 for me it\u2019s as if I don\u2019t believe God has healed me if I do\u2026

I’m seeking His face for a sign re His will\u2026what the spirit has reminded me is I have AUTHORITY to trample on serpents etc and by no means will their poison harm me\u2026.Chemo is poison and I claim that scripture regarding chemo\u2026..the regime proposed causes hair loss and may affect my nails\u2026.have told the devil \u2026he will not take my hair \u2026.I\u2019ll cut it off first \u2013 cant take what aint there \u2026and I\u2019ll paint my nails black !!!…wont see what he\u2019s up to\u2026.

I\u2019ve asked to have the chemo at home (delay strategy) so have been referred to a private oncologist will meet him this week \u2026.God will go before me and make my way smooth\u2026will keep you posted\u2026

I\u2019m slowly but surely getting fatter by the day\u2026gonna take time\u2026but I\u2019m on the road to recovery\u2026thank Victoria (wink wink girls..it\u2019s a secret\u2026pun intended) for my uplift in front and Caroline for my rear end support\u2026

Love you all dearly…God’s favor is yours now and always in all you truly desire to accomplish….from my heart to yours……<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

The reality of having Cancer  and getting rid of the source if possible \u2026is that there is no guarantee that you can get it all \u2013 hence the need for Chemotherapy\u2026the thought alone is soo scary \u2026.and there I was a frail shadow of my former self\u2026.trying to get back to my world\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


You just have to accept the offer to TRY \u2013 and add more years to your life \u2026.and  determine not to let it phase you\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


August 7 at 1:28pm
Hi all \u2026a quick one \u2026still seeking his face re Chemo \u2013 Consultant on holidays for 2 weeks \u2026will meet up when he gets back\u2026

Must confess I\u2019m going crazy \u2013 don\u2019t know how those who choose not to work cope with just being at home \u2026not funny at all\u2026.ignore and forgive my rambles on FB\u2026I no get work \u2026:0)…ps cannot bring myself to buy “The” shoes…am i finally cured of my addiction ???

What is breaking my boredom is the love from you all in different ways \u2013 be it a phone call, text or inbox message \u20262 in particular have made me stop and think\u2026a friend asked who had supported me the most during my recent trials and I said the MacMillan Nurses \u2013 she\u2019s taking part in a charity run to raise funds for them \u2026.pls support her with whatever you can \u2026the truth though as I told her is that my Pillar folks have supported me the most but only God can and will reward you all\u2026cut and paste the link below…
http:\/\/www.justgiving.com\/dupekuponiyi

Another Sister sent me this and it just dramatises my trial and Gods role in my Victory \u2026thanks for being in the crowd cheering me on \u2026..Knowing you\u2019re all there gives me such strength and hope and a sense of being a winner \u2026.Love you all lots \u2026cut and paste the link below….
http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/video\/video.php?v=139007432797147&ref=nf
<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–
August 24 at 1:20pm
No excuse for the lack of communication\u2026in a way it\u2019s a good sign I\u2019m not dwelling on my state of health\u2026have been busy looking for work and avoiding Shoe Sales\u2026

Now totally bored and frustrated \u2026NEED to get back to work\u2026.

I start Chemo on Thursday\u2026this week \u2026cannot wait for it to be all over\u2026.spoke to my Pastors Wife the other day and she described me as Fearless throughout this trial \u2026if I\u2019m so it\u2019s because I know who to fear \u2013 thanks to Pastor Kofi\u2019s teaching and my experiential knowledge of the Trinity \u2013 God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit \u2013 what joy to truly know the role they play in my life\u2026

Thought yesterday that I\u2019m Spirit Body and Soul (mind)\u2026while my body was attacked\u2026my Spirit took control and took over my mind and so I am Victorious\u2026 but the key is that my Spirit is not alone and therefore understanding that indeed greater is he who is within me than anything else both my Spirit and Soul could align\u2026 even my body is responding to the my beliefs \u2013 I weighed 48kg when I left hospital \u2026..i\u2019m now 57.4 kg\u2026..feeling quite cool with my revelation knowledge \u2026the devil asked me to use my \u201ctheory\u201d to explain why my little cousin is seemingly having mental health issues\u2026

I broke it down for him \u2026you attacked her mind\u2026and therefore her manifestations are of hallucinations and ramblings\u2026depression, anxiety etc are all Spirits \u2026but note through it all \u2026she is sane enough to ask for help\u2026I believe her Spirit is being assisted by the Holy Spirit to resist\u2026we her family will join with her to resist you and you will indeed flee \u2013 have not heard from him since\u2026.Please join me in praying for Kemi \u2013 that it will indeed be well with her \u2026..

Will let you know re first Chemo \u2026I am trusting God that no weapon fashioned or formed against me will prosper and I shall astound the clinical team by not exhibiting the symptoms they expect one on the drugs to.

Thanking you all again and again for all your support \u2026\u2026
<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————–
August 27 at 7:07pm
24 hours on from my first Chemo session and I\u2019m OKAY\u2026was given the opportunity to SAVE my hair…decided against it …have asked God to please give me less nigger hair this time around …love the feeling of rubbing my hand over a bald head…lets see if i like it when the head is mine…cant wait for all the pixie styles i’ll be able to do….

Have had such a productive symptom free day \u2026

Made breakfast for Mum and I

Booked myself on a conference and got \u00a31400.00 pounds of discount \u2013 which I hasten to add was offered to me without me asking \u2013 and found out that by going a day earlier I save myself quite a bit on the flight \u2026(that bit will be useful for window shopping and the extra day gives me the opportunity ) favour or what \u2026

Applied for a few jobs\u2026chased after others\u2026

My old school girls meeting \u2026which incidentally I started organising before I went into hospital and never made it to \u2013 raised \u00a31500.00 for me which got sent to me to day\u2026

Made lunch \u2013 we had iyan and efo \u2026which I made from the raw ingredients \u2013 okay mum opened the plum tin\u2026

Mum has been looking at me funny all day only to confess that her fellow nursing colleagues have been wondering how she\u2019s coping as I\u2019m supposed to be throwing up, feeling down and having diarrhoea \u2013 at least\u2026feeling tired because even I know I\u2019ve over done it at the computer today \u2013 actually missed come dine with me \u2026but seriously I feel fine\u2026keep placing my hand on my forehead\u2026 to check….

So all in all God has indeed been faithful as we expected he would!!!!…He sure has my back and makes a way when there seems to be a way \u2026oh the joy you get when you serve the Lord.

Ps \u2026I no go lie oh \u2026I booked the Conference ASAP when he offered me the discount \u2013 some of my medication is known to cause hallucinations\u2026.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I look back at my exploits in September 2010 and know without a doubt that God was my source and that he sure loves me\u2026I imagine him looking at me with a smile as only a parent can at a child bent on doing what they want to do not knowing the perils ahead\u2026and as a loving father \u2026ensuring my way is smooth by instructing that it is made so \u2026without a word to me \u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Indeed those who know their God \u2013 shall do exploits\u2026..<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

September 9 at 3:50pm
Aside from flu like aches and pains and rashes all over my body which lasted 2 days \u2013 I reminded God that I was not going to have any adverse effects to the chemo and in 2 days my whole skin cleared up without medication\u2026I\u2019ve been fine\u2026in fact over this same period \u2026

I\u2019ve been able to network for my conference next week and in the process been appointed co manager for an online discussion group

Managed to somehow get roped into writing for a magazine with regards my thoughts on the conference and trends in the specialist area

Finalised a bid proposal for a consortium of friends on a large high profile programme \u2013 which might mean I have some work in the future

Plan a once in a lifetime trip in November to celebrate a friend\u2019s birthday with her \u2013 must share the testimony of that sometime\u2026indeed all you need God has either given you or will give you when you ask\u2026

The goodness of God makes me smile \u2026this week alone I\u2019ve heard from an ex boyfriend who was overwhelmed with the whole situation and just wanted me to know that he\u2019s praying for me\u2026.(I was touched that he reached out) .another male friend who is gutted that he cannot bless me financially as things are tight (told him ..his concern and constant calls from Nigeria are priceless) and got a cheque from a dear brother \u2013 who apologized as he did not want me to be offended by the gesture) \u2013 Offended \u2026this means I can stock up my larder\u2026God is showing me \u2013 the cynic that that there are some good men out there\u2026

It\u2019s started \u2013 the hair loss\u2026but girlfriends on a positive note those stubborn facial hairs go as well\u2026no hairs are spared \u2026:0)\u2026funny enough had to shape my eyebrows yesterday they are still unaffected\u2026must find a template to draw them in when they finally go \u2026

I\u2019m so Blessed\u2026and grateful to God \u2026as I told my ex \u2013 have been given a second chance and boy will I use it to the max \u2026

Just been sent pictures of the New Bentley Continental GT\u2026I\u2019m in love !!!! \u2026need to look out for a Sheik next week\u2026wish me luck folks \u2026
<\/em>——————————————————————————————————————<\/p>\n\n\n\n

September 16 at 7:59pm
Day 0 I arrived safe and sound – thank God….felt fluey…luckily had stocked up on Lemsip at the airport and robb from my last trip to Nigeria…so it was my Kings Sized bed and Fox Movies and eating without etiquette in my room for the first night…Sofitel Jumeirah Beach Residence is a must guys if in Dubai\u2026.

Day 1…. One particular speaker gives talk bearing no resemblance to advertised session and then has the cheek to pass the mic round the room asking us what we’d learnt …trust me …told her I was still struggling with how to derive my revenue model…as I was looking forward to the session for insight…one bobo asked for his money back oh…and another told her off and told her to put together a session to address the things she had not covered….

Me starting to think \u2013 oh oh..Can\u2019t really afford for this to have been a wasted trip\u2026but remember how God had made a way for me to get there?

Knowing God had a plan I decided to stay focused\u2026

Day 2 was definitely better…God showed up big time \u2026I\u2019d prayed that he would draw men unto me \u2026did not want to have to make the first move\u2026but had rehearsed what I wanted to get across and done some reading around key issues
…got there at 08:15 as the programme stated was told we start at 09:00 – no problem sitting jejely…this Japanese guy comes up to me and we get talking…I tell him my take on the conference issued and he gets excited and says we must do something together
…go to grab a coffee and this Pharmaceutical Consulting Company Head of Strategy comes up to me with his mate the Digital Director and asks if I want to work with them as an Associate. They are London based so I\u2019ll meet up with them here in London. met the VP from a WHO network – a fellow Nigerian who I have said MUST open doors for me …we’ll be hooking up as soon as I sort myself out…also met a global advisor who is happy to come to Nigeria if I can set things up
Later that evening a girl at dinner promises to see if she can get me to a conference in Jo’burg – for free…at this stage I’m in awe of God he is indeed faithful….


Day 3
Jet lag taking effect\u2026.really tired so just did the first half of the day left after lunch…but boy was it a useful few hours…again – I kid you not …this Finnish man and I are at the buffet table he asks how I am…what I want to achieve…I go into my rehearsed networking intro…and he asks if I know some guy in the UK…nope…how he’ll link me up with him as he knows about getting funds to do projects in Africa….

I’m writing my action plan for when I get back and one of my new friends from Australia suggests a few next steps…I\u2019m shocked and show him my notes – the same and more …God sure confirms his word….

Spent the rest of the afternoon spontaneously singing praises to God all day…just dancing about the room giving him Praise he is so sooo faithful to his word….I hope I don\u2019t let him down….

I felt the need to boast of the Lords goodness…and to say oh taste and see that he is true to his word\u2026I challenge anyone with a dream to set out in faith and watch him perform tangible miracles \u2013 eye has not seen nor ears heard\u2026I\u2019m scared\u2026but know he\u2019ll be there for and with me \u2026so I\u2019m stepping out \u2026what about you??

Health wise I\u2019m tired \u2026as expected from travelling \u2026but not much else\u2026I now have bald patches on my head \u2026and yes its soft and smooth \u2013 at least the hair could have fallen out systematically so I would have had a short back and sides style or a Mohican\u2026oh well\u2026.Chemo Session 2 is on Monday \u2013 boring boring \u2026

but to think that only a few months ago I was bedridden \u2026and that my trip to Dubai in January could have been my last\u2026 and to hear of friends and peoples relatives who have passed away since I was diagnosed\u2026all I can say is I owe you all BIG TIME\u2026

Thanks for the continued support and prayers \u2026I sincerely wish you all well and pray that my God who favours no one over the other will cause you to smile as I have over the last few days \u2026I felt like a child in a sweet shop\u2026no wrong analogy \u2026.I was me in a discount shoe shop \u2026finding my size \u2013 pure joy!!!!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

September 30 at 8:07pm
\u2026have reacting adversely to the chemo\u2026a burning sensation runs through my veins especially at night so I have not been sleeping\u2026but has the Lord been on my side or what?

I\u2019m so blessed \u2026been mulling over how to share this without the essence of what I need to share being misunderstood\u2026but share I must and if I seem boastful \u2013 I boast of the goodness of my God \u2026

Oh taste and see that nothing is too difficult for him and Yes \u2013 he hears even the murmurs of our hearts\u2026..

Went to Dubai with the little I had left in my coiffeurs but trusted God that he would replenish as my project will bring glory to his name and an opportunity to be well looked after for his people\u2026.

Got back and there was not much food at home, mum and I planned each meal ignoring the dwindling options\u2026people would call and ask how I was coping and id say \u2013 trust me when the cupboards are bare \u2013 God sends me actual food or money for food\u2026.I know he has my back\u2026 \u2026.

So on Sunday when a friend visiting from Lagos came round and asked the same question \u2013 I gave him my standard response \u2013 he smiled reached for his cheque book \u2013 I teased him \u2013 you Naija people who walks around issuing cheques\u2026anyway his cheque book was empty \u2013 we laughed about it and I thanked him for the attempt\u2026.he left with my bank details\u2026

Monday I attempt to log into my account to pay my water bill and I am very confused at the figures before me \u2026my friend had given me a gift of \u00a35000.00\u2026 \u2026Mum and I gave thanks to God\u2026not only had my friend given me peace of mind for the next few months but he\u2019d proven to us that God is indeed faithful\u2026.

A sister from church reminded me of my giving and asked why I was surprised that God was blessing me left right and center….I argued with her that I had never given to receive \u2026I\u2019d given more out of annoyance that when it came to the kingdom \u2026people tended to hold back \u2026and she reminded me of when I had given sacrificially \u2013 she worked in the treasury team and knew when I\u2019d given an offering as my friend that I could not really afford it \u2026it brought tears to my eyes that God would indeed remember me !!!

My challenge to you all is to honor what you know of God \u2026for as you do so you store up blessings for yourself which will come in handy your time of need\u2026..

I\u2019m completely bald now \u2026.but have been promised a bespoke wig\u2026so watch out for my diva look in a few weeks time\u2026although my soft bald head has been described as cute \u2026.:0)\u2026..

Please agree with me that the chemo will not continue to burn through my veins and that I will sleep soundly at night\u2026.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Continuing with life I updated the pillars so at the end of November 2010<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n


November 2010<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sorry I\u2019ve been under the Radar for sometime \u2026I\u2019ve been battling with the adverse reactions of the chemo and Mum left last week so I\u2019m getting used to being home alone\u2026its fine –  no offers to move in or take me in will be taken seriously \u2026
Got back from Vegas yesterday and was out at a client\u2019s scoping meeting this morning \u2013 how I did not rest my head on the desk and start to snore I\u2019ll never understand\u2026need to share my experience over the last few days \u2026
Missed my Las Vegas \u2013 Los Angeles flight on Monday \u2013 long story \u2026but while I was waiting at the boarding gate this man keeled over and died \u2013 I cried and begged God to spare him ..my thoughts being for those waiting for him at the other end \u2026I felt sad for him that this was how it was going to end for him and sincerely hoped that he had accepted Christ as his saviour\u2026.life is so transient folks \u2013 if you\u2019re not sure about your relationship with God \u2013 seek him and spend time with him and know that you are His\u2026don\u2019t think so \u2013 KNOW so !!!!
Scoping meeting this morning was a follow on from my Dubai connection \u2013 remember the Consultant who asked me to join him as an Associate (the phrase \u201cI promised to draw all men unto Thee\u201d just dropped into my spirit. Thank you faithful dependable Father) called and asked if I\u2019d go to see the client with him and if successful would I lead the project? \u2026I said \u201cYes\u201d on both counts
Paul \u2013 the Consultant guy offered to pick me up at home \u2013 which he did\u2026 on the way in the traffic we got talking and I told him about the airport guy and my concern for him \u2026then he asked me what I\u2019d been doing all year and I told him my story\u2026he could not believe it \u2026and I shared the fact that I\u2019m a Pentecostal Christian with him and how my faith to stand had come from God and all of you \u2026he\u2019s either a Christian or a believer not too sure of himself  because he asked me a lot about Pentecostal Churches and kept saying things like: \u201cthis was meant to be\u2026\u201d
Anyway we have the meeting \u2013 I spoke only twice if you ignore the \u201cHello\u201d and \u201cGood bye\u201d and Paul could not stop saying how relevant my questions were and how the client was suitably impressed \u2013 I guess I opened my mouth and the Holy Spirit gave me utterance \u2026..but more excitingly, as we were leaving the building we met the head of legal affairs and they started talking\u2026 I stood looking at her and said to the holy spirit \u2013 she looks so sad \u2013 hope she\u2019s okay \u2026Paul then asked her how she was and she said her dad had just been diagnosed with Cancer\u2026 Holy Spirit asked me to say something and I was like: \u201chave not been introduced to her yet ????…\u201d Paul then says: \u201cRuth, this is Yvonne\u2026she\u2019s got a wealth of experience n the NHS\u2026\u201d and I added: \u201cand with Cancer \u2013 I go for Chemo tomorrow\u201d. You should have seen her face\u2026 \u201cBut you look so well\u201d she said. I said: \u201cThat\u2019s because I refuse to acknowledge it in my life\u201d. Told her I was wearing a wig and could take it off to prove my point\u2026.I was able to advice her on how to support her dad and seek private intervention ASAP\u2026\u2026Paul thanked me in the car \u2013 saying it was destined to be that we met up with Ruth as we\u2019d arrived 30 mins late for the meeting\u2026told him it was the least I could do \u2026
You know the drill folks \u2013 please join me in praying for a miracle for Ruth\u2019s dad\u2026I know I\u2019ll see her again and want to be able to tell her that we prayed \u2026but more importantly about our loving Father who gives us hope\u2026.
Vegas was a blast from the perspective of party \u2013 will gist you when pictures are available\u2026but VERY evident why it\u2019s called \u201csin city\u201d\u2026so sad\u2026.
Off to chemo tomorrow \u2013 hope I\u2019m considered fit as I have a sore throat \u2013 Vegas was COOOOOLD\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Oh what a Year !!!

It\u2019s a Year today (13\/05\/2011) that I had the mass removed. A year today that I was given a second chance\u2026.from today I have 2 birthdays as I will NEVER forget 2010.

Thinking about it brings mixed emotions\u2026none of which are regret\u2026I am definitely a better person for my trial\u2026I have learned of God’s power, wisdom, and sovereignty in this world\u2026


My penultimate note to the Pillars was:
<\/strong>
Finally\u2026.I can say tomorrow is my last Chemo Session \u2026..

Have mixed feelings as its finally ALL OVER NOW\u2026and I have to get back to reality\u2026but I must say \u2026I feel honored to have been tested this way\u2026

I now know what I know about God as a matter of fact and not just from what I hear or have read about him\u2026.

Boy can I tell of his mercies and his grace and his faithfulness\u2026

I cannot thank you all enough for being with\u2026all that remains now is OUR Victory Dance\u2026.I will definitely keep you all posted\u2026.

My Christmas Gift to you all is that My God shall surprise you with the desires of your heart as you seek him for one thing this season \u2026Please ASK, believing you receive and he is faithful  – as no good thing will he keep from you\u2026.

I\u2019ve made some brilliant friends through all this and I thank God\u2026.I have heard some heart wrenching stories which have given me prayer points\u2026some of you as you have stood with me have yourselves had issue to deal with \u2026I assure you I pray for and with you \u2026My God is not a respecter of persons and will show himself strong if you seek him\u2026I implore you to do so if you find that Life throws you more than you can physically handle\u2026.

Have a wonderful Christmas Break\u2026not a Christmas person myself \u2013 I believe in celebrating Christ EVERYDAY and give more credence to Easter and its significance\u2026..in fact roll on New Year\u2026

I am indebted to you all \u2013 THANK YOU !!!!! from the bottom of my heart\u2026I promise to live my life to the MAX !!!! giving of all that I have to make this world a better place \u2026\u2026
<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

FINAL POST NEXT WEEK!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

——————————————————————————————————————–<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The beginning beckons\u2026

Had an appointment \u2013 the first of many reviews on the 10th of January 2011 to see if the Chemo had worked\u2026.my final words to the Pillar were:<\/strong>


January 10 2011 at 8:07pm

Can\u2019t believe it\u2019s officially OVER !!!!!! ..have been so overwhelmed today \u2013 final report says it all \u2013 Everything normal \u2026even my internal scars have healed well\u2026it is indeed a miracle ..Yet my heart is heavy \u2026

Heavy with gratitude that this story could have been so different \u2026heavy with the thoughts of those who did not make it \u2026heavy at the thought of facing up to my responsibilities in life \u2013 I\u2019ve been so pampered and spoilt by you all\u2026 the illness, surgery and recovery is now a distant memory \u2026but for the visible scars ..I\u2019d honestly believe it\u2019s all been a bad dream \u2026or I was in a coma\u2026

I cannot help but feel special and blessed and now need to prove myself worthy of such favour by making a BIG difference to at least one person\u2019s life \u2026.to the glory of God\u2026

The blessings keep coming and its difficult to see all this as a bad thing that has happened to me \u2026was waiting to be seen by the Radiographer on Friday \u2013 pondering my current financial situation \u2026the bailiffs had come to the house on Thursday and promised to come back regarding my Council Tax bill\u2026I\u2019ve been wrangling with them since I got out of Hospital that this is not a WONT PAY issue but CANT PAY – for now scenario\u2026as to be honest if I had the money they are not first on my list or priorities \u2026and telling God that I knew he\u2019d show up but could he tell me WHEN exactly \u2026when a friend sent me a text promising me \u00a31000, \u00a3300 of which she\u2019d paid into my account \u2026

.I could not cry and rejoice as I really wanted to ,..but with tears in my eyes I thanked her and narrated the story to another mutual friend who called me just after I\u2019d responded to my friends text \u2026my benefactor is therefore angry with me \u2026and I hope she realises from this that I did so without malice \u2026.

I can\u2019t wait to get back to work \u2026to be able to organise the Victory Dance\u2026.another motivational evening In His Presence \u2026. And start to live my life in the abundance ordained for me \u2026. Sitting on the bus coming back from the hospital \u2026I was people watching and thanking God that I was not confound to my hospital room or bed\u2026anymore\u2026

This will be my last posting to the group\u2026you have indeed been pillars of support – more than I could ever have imagined when I made the first call for support\u2026.there is no way I would have been able to get through this alone\u2026..

Will keep you posted on the details for the Victory Dance well in advance \u2026.Thank You ALL for your love and support these past 12 months\u2026

The words of R Kelly have become my anthem song for this trial …http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=cEsEPZ0661c<\/a>


I can see the colors of the rainbow,
and I can feel the sun on my face,
I see the light at the end of the tunnel,
and I can feel heaven in its place,
and that\u2019s the sign of a victory (x2)

Yvonne ~ Warrior Princess

As I read this again I\u2019m reminded of my birthday thoughts a few weeks ago \u2013 April 26th 2011 \u2026I could not bring myself to party and prance about \u2026my heart was full of gratitude to a God who had heard my cry for help\u2026.I prayed and prayed and ended up asking God to Bless himself\u2026\u2026

I\u2019m in such a good place now\u2026don\u2019t have a job, have debts to pay, feelings of frustration and depression come and go \u2026but in it all I know of God\u2019s promises to me and stand on them as I know without a shadow of a doubt that he is Faithful to keep his word\u2026I am comforted by the ending of Job\u2019s story\u2026\u2026

Job was RESTORED, COMFORTED, AND BLESSED (Job 42:10-17)\u2026and guess what folks he died at 140 years old \u2026\u2026 he saw his children and their children to the fourth generation\u2026My God is no respecter of persons\u2026and he changeth not ..has he not said it \u2026boy will he see it through\u2026whatever your trial \u2026Trust that he will see you through \u2026

I strongly believe that there is an extra resilience gene in the DNA of us Black Women \u2026implanted by our God who knew the terrain we would walk in this life \u2026I don\u2019t think it\u2019s by accident that we as a race seemingly have a positive capacity to cope with stress and adversity and function better than expected as a people \u2013 my fellow Nigerians will understand where I am coming from \u2026which is why I KNOW we are destined for greatness\u2026and as such we must rise above the trials of life to be who God has ordained us to be ..the world NEEDS us\u2026.Be Black and Proud !!!!

Its been a privilege to share my journey with you all\u2026\u2026

Yvonne \u2013 Warrior Princess
20\/05\/2011
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This blog is the story of my journey dealing with a Cancer diagnosis.  My theory is that my faith in God and tenacity as an African woman, have contributed to my triumph in the face of adversity. 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