{"id":1081,"date":"2023-03-24T15:12:00","date_gmt":"2023-03-24T15:12:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.feelnubia.com\/?p=1081"},"modified":"2025-06-19T16:55:18","modified_gmt":"2025-06-19T16:55:18","slug":"the-third-person-in-my-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/feelnubiatest.com\/index.php\/2023\/village-family-relationships\/the-third-person-in-my-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"A Three-Braided Cord: The Third Person in Our Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n
\r\n
\"\"

A three-braided cord is not easily broken (Image: Tim Boote @ Unsplash)<\/p><\/div>\r\n\r\n<\/figure>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

There\u2019s a third wheel in our marriage\u2014and we could not do without Him.<\/strong><\/h2>\r\n

He is our referee, umpire, judge, friend, confidant, sounding board, cheerleader, chastiser, supporter, and constant companion.<\/p>\r\n

A few days before our wedding more than a decade ago, a friend gave me some unforgettable advice: \u201cTwo are better than one, but a threefold cord is not easily broken.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\r\n

At first, I thought, \u201cNo third party should ever be allowed into a marriage.\u201d But thankfully, I thought again\u2014and I didn\u2019t think for long.<\/p>\r\n

The Divine Matchmaker<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

The third person\u2014let\u2019s call Him TW\u2014was actually our matchmaker. I had crafted a detailed list of the kind of husband I desired: God-fearing, professional, principled, committed, family-oriented, intellectually equal, trustworthy. Athleticism and charm were optional, but integrity and spiritual depth were non-negotiable.<\/p>\r\n

I shared this long list with TW, expecting a chuckle. But He didn\u2019t flinch. TW never does anything halfway. Instead, He delivered beyond expectation\u2014a man tailor-made for me.<\/p>\r\n

When I met the man TW found, he was everything I hoped for and more. Taller than me, older (by just a few weeks), the eldest in a tightly-knit family, creative, intelligent, and deeply in love with God. Jackpot!<\/p>\r\n

Moving In Together<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

So it made sense to invite TW to live with us. It might sound strange, but it was the best decision we ever made. He doesn\u2019t take up much space, and all He asks for is our trust.<\/p>\r\n

He knows us better than we know ourselves. He teaches us what we need to know about each other, even what we\u2019re too afraid to say aloud. He knows when to speak, when to nudge, and when to hold back.<\/p>\r\n

Mediator, Mentor, Motivator<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

When conflict arises, He calms the storm. Many times, I\u2019ve been too frustrated to speak rationally. TW would whisper, \u201cLet me handle it.\u201d Later, my husband would come back saying, \u201cI\u2019m sorry. I should\u2019ve done better.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

I would catch TW\u2019s eye and know exactly who had stepped in.<\/p>\r\n

A Timely Rescue<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

One night, a seductive stranger showed up at my husband\u2019s office. She was insistent, crossing all boundaries. My husband hesitated. Then TW entered\u2014bringing with Him the scent of my perfume.<\/p>\r\n

That subtle cue was all it took. My husband found his strength and swiftly ended the encounter.<\/p>\r\n

TW didn\u2019t lecture or shame. He simply rescued. Without fanfare. With love.<\/p>\r\n

When I Quit My Job<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

After 17 years of working, I made the tough call to stop. It wasn\u2019t easy. I trusted my husband, yes. But TW was my anchor.<\/p>\r\n

When I confessed my fear, He asked, \u201cDo you trust Me?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

That was all I needed to hear. And just like that, we jumped\u2014together.<\/p>\r\n

Against All Odds<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

We\u2019ve survived so much: two homes in two countries, a house full of children, four dogs, guests galore, multiple businesses, ministries, and family demands from every direction.<\/p>\r\n

We run on one income and God\u2019s provision. And still, we give, serve, and love.<\/p>\r\n

None of this makes sense\u2014unless you know about TW.<\/p>\r\n

The Strength of Three<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

With Him, we are more than just a couple\u2014we are a fortified team. Like the Three Musketeers<\/a>, like the Trinity. Strong. Undeterred. Grace-filled.<\/p>\r\n

We know that TW is not our equal. He is greater. And yet, He chooses to walk with us daily. He is gentle, never forceful. But oh, how powerful His presence is.<\/p>\r\n

He is the one who makes our marriage work.<\/p>\r\n

You May Know Him Too<\/strong><\/h3>\r\n

TW goes by many names. Some call Him the Counsellor. Others, the Comforter. I call Him the Holy Spirit\u2014the Friend who sticks closer than a husband.<\/p>\r\n

He is the third strand in our cord, the secret to our joy, the reason we keep going.<\/p>\r\n

And we wouldn\u2019t have it any other way.<\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Read more relationship stories<\/a><\/p>\r\n

For more thoughts on the marriage,<\/a> grab a copy of the e-book<\/a> with the same title by Lola Babalola. NOW selling here<\/a>!!<\/em><\/p>\r\n

This article contains affiliate links<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":21,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[116],"tags":[748,693,721,310,749,128,719,336,156,311,720,717,718],"class_list":["post-1081","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-village-family-relationships","tag-babalola","tag-counselling","tag-differences","tag-feel","tag-helpmeet","tag-intelligentsia","tag-interference","tag-lola","tag-marriage","tag-nubia","tag-reconciliation","tag-third","tag-wheel"],"yoast_head":"\nA Three-Braided Cord: The Third Person in Our Marriage - Feelnubia - Home of Africa's Intelligentsia- Be Africa!<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/feelnubiatest.com\/index.php\/2023\/village-family-relationships\/the-third-person-in-my-marriage\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A Three-Braided Cord: The Third Person in Our Marriage - 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